What are people saying about The Pathway to Love:

“Insightful, practical, heartfully and psychologically sound, The Pathway to Love provides the steppingstones to creating genuine love in your life.  It is a must-read for those who value honesty, authentic commitment to self and other, and appreciate relationship as a vehicle to self-actualization.”

—Michael Bernard Beckwith, author of Spiritual Liberation~Fulfilling Your Soul’s Potential

 

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You will wonder at times how she knew about you and a particular significant other because she seems to describe you and the relationship to a T. And, when you read the last page you will wish you had read it years and a number of relationships earlier.

Irene Conlan

I have read other books on this topic which spoke to me... This book, which I got in the Kindle version, pulled it all together for me--the biology, personal values, self identity, the human quest for belonging and intimacy. The book... brought to me great understanding. I wish I had ordered the paper version with the workbook. I ended up going back and ordering it.

Paula Markgraf Katz

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Entries in Relationship Help (6)

Wednesday
Nov122014

Find Out The Secret to Change and Transformation

"We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses." C.G. Jung

This quote reflects and reaffirms the heart of phase three in The Pathway to Love. Acceptance is an absolute pre-requisite for intimacy, healing and transformation.

Acceptance is what creates a sacred space. A sacred space is what creates a possibility for something new, different, deeper, more meaningful. It is through our acceptance that we find our way in, out, and through.

So next time you find yourself in a power struggle or at war with yourself or someone else, stop and ask yourself "What do I need to accept?"

Next time you find yourself impatient, frustrated, or wishing things were different, stop and ask yourself "How can I accept things as they are in this very moment?"

And finally, next time you find yourself berating yourself, stop and ask yourself "How can I demonstrate compassion, understanding and acceptance for myself?"

The answers lie within the space of acceptance. Once we accept ourselves, others, and circumstances for who and what they are, we unlock the key to knowing exactly what to choose and do next and who we want to become.

For more information on the four phases of a developing relationship, please visit www.JulieOrlov.com/pathway-to-love. If you are interested in scheduling a coaching or psychotherapy appointment, please call 310-379-5855 or 1-888-99PATHS.

As always, I am committed to helping you create strong and intimate relationships.

Be well,
Julie

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Sunday
Oct192014

Are you up for an experiment? I challenge you to live like Charles Schultz!

Charles Schultz was a lucky man. Read why.

 "My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I’m happy. I can’t figure it out. What am I doing right?" – Charles Schultz

I think the reason why Charles Schultz lived his life as a happy man was because he purposely avoided over thinking--the meaning of life--his life. We spend a lot of time thinking--thinking about what happened in the past, what it meant, what is happening to us right now, how can we overcome it, what will happen in the future and how we can control it.

I know we all have a frontal cortex that is designed to do just that. But really, don't you think we over think things a bit too much? Maybe our frontal cortex is responsible for our unhappiness? Maybe we'd all be better off if we just didn't try to be so smart and so clever in figuring things out. Just possibly Charles got it right. No meaning, no purpose. Just life.

I say let's give it a try. For one week, stop living your life in pursuit of anything. Don't over think it. Just live.

Let me know how it goes!

Be well,

Julie

P.S. If you or someone you know wants to create strong and intimate relationships, don't hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized guidance and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today. Take advantage of the opportunity receive the support and guidance you deserve. As always, I’m here to support you in creating strong and intimate relationships.

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

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Sunday
Dec292013

Taking Time To Reflect on Past, Present and Future

As we get closer to the end of the year, this is the time we naturally reflect back on what occurred during the past year and what we want in the year to come. I personally love this ritual and think it is so important that you engage in this as well. Whether you use your birthday, a major life event, your favorite time of year, or the more traditional New Year's celebration, doesn't matter to me--just as long as you take some time every year to reflect on what has been, what is, and what you'd like to create here on out.

To help you with this process, I've provided some guiding questions and sample responses. I've also given you two guiding activities to anchor the experience.

First, ask yourself the following: 

Click Read in Browser to access full exercise.

P.S. Don't forget to take advantage of my holiday special—the gift that keeps on giving every day of every year. Order your copy of The Pathway to Love at-home program for 30% off and begin to create strong and intimate relationships in every area of your life today. Give yourself (and the people in your life that count) the gift of love and relationships. You deserve it!  Order Now!

Offer good until Friday January 3rd

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Wednesday
Sep112013

Desperate to Win Back Your Ex? What Are You Really Desperate For?

I get tons of emails from people asking me how to win their boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband, you name it, back. They are in pain and desperate. They regret breaking up with their significant other or worse, regret causing the breakup in the first place—or so it seems.

As people struggle with the transition from being a ‘we’ to an ‘I’, it is normal to want a do-over—to go back and make things right. I find this to be true regardless if you were the one who made the decision to break up or not. What's even more interesting, is that this phenomenon occurs even when the relationship and/or the "ex" was less than desirable—people will ignore all the reasons the relationship ended in the first place. During this painful time of detaching and feeling like there is no solid ground beneath you, one's memory of the relationship becomes distorted. All of a sudden, all the horrible things your ex did or the fact that you wanted a serious relationship and your ex did not, goes to the way side.  All you can think about is how to get him or her back. The ‘getting back’ becomes paramount regardless of the circumstances. You can't seem to stop and consider if you got what you wanted, would you want what you got?

Having said this, there are those situations when someone sabotaged a relationship or ran from one out of fear who later discovered that their fears were not nearly as important or relevant as being with the person they grew to love. Under these circumstances, it makes sense to revisit the relationship with a new appreciation and understanding of what really matters to you and what you're willing to do to win your love back and make it work. However, these individuals typically do not exhibit any desperate energy. They choose to contact their ex and have an open and honest conversation about what their past behaviors were all about and what they'd like to create from here on out. Sometimes it's too late and sometimes it's not. They accept whatever verdict ensues.

But for those of you that feel desperate, as if your life cannot go on without your ex, here are some things for you to consider before you go about trying to cajole and manipulate anyone back. Ask yourself the following:

To read full article, click Read in Browser.

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Sunday
Aug112013

Do I Stay or Do I Leave? When to Call it Quits 

You've been unhappy in your relationship for some time. You and your significant other have argued, negotiated and retreated in your attempts to navigate the differences between you.  You've tried counseling but you found that you were the only one interested in making a change. In the end, you've come to the conclusion that you and your partner are simply not a good match. As painful as it is, your love for your mate is faltering and you can no longer accept things as they are. You long for a different kind of relationship and are unwilling to settle for anything less. You've let go of any hope for anything better--you've worked through your last ounce of resistance to letting go.  You tell yourself that tonight you will tell your partner that you want to end the relationship. 

Making the final decision to end a relationship is not easy. Typically, it takes time, a lot of pain and multiple attempts to make things better before accepting that the relationship is no longer working. Some people struggle endlessly, prolonging the agonizing decision much longer than is necessary. Others may jump ship too quickly, accepting defeat before they've given the effort and time necessary to fix what feels broken. It is hard to know when to call it quits. It's hard to give up on someone you love, a relationship you value and the hope that this would be the one to last a lifetime.

To help those of you that are currently wrestling with the dilemma of "Do I stay or do I go?"--here are some guidelines to help you figure out when to call it quits and when to hang in there and give it one more try. 

Read the important article in its entirety - Click Read in Browser

FYI- As you may have already heard, Gmail is rolling out some new features to automatically filter your email messages for you (this also applies if you use Google Apps for your business email address!).

Gmail is phasing in a new "tabbed inbox" system. You may have already seen it in your inbox if you use Gmail. If not, you'll see it soon. Google is rolling the new system out to users overtime. They've split your inbox into 5 separate inboxes and created tabs across the top labeling each "Primary, Social, Promotions, Updates and Forums".

My emails to you will most likely fall under promotions. To ensure that you get the information you want from me, here’s what you can do.

Option 1:

1 - Click on the Promotions inbox tab.

2 - Drag any emails from people you want to hear from and drop them onto the tab that says “Primary.” Then, when it asks if you want future emails to go into your Primary inbox, just click yes.

For the next few weeks, as Gmail phases these new tabbed inboxes in, be sure to check your Promotions inbox to make sure nothing else you really want is getting caught (and lost) in it.

Option 2:   If you want to completely remove these new tabs - go to the Settings box in the upper right hand corner of your inbox and select "Settings." Click on the "Inbox" tab and unselect all categories but "Primary" (don't forget to save your changes).

I hope this information is helpful to you. Thanks in advance for making sure we can stay connected!

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