What are people saying about The Pathway to Love:

“Insightful, practical, heartfully and psychologically sound, The Pathway to Love provides the steppingstones to creating genuine love in your life.  It is a must-read for those who value honesty, authentic commitment to self and other, and appreciate relationship as a vehicle to self-actualization.”

—Michael Bernard Beckwith, author of Spiritual Liberation~Fulfilling Your Soul’s Potential

 

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You will wonder at times how she knew about you and a particular significant other because she seems to describe you and the relationship to a T. And, when you read the last page you will wish you had read it years and a number of relationships earlier.

Irene Conlan

I have read other books on this topic which spoke to me... This book, which I got in the Kindle version, pulled it all together for me--the biology, personal values, self identity, the human quest for belonging and intimacy. The book... brought to me great understanding. I wish I had ordered the paper version with the workbook. I ended up going back and ordering it.

Paula Markgraf Katz

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Entries in breakups (10)

Sunday
Apr242016

Breaking Up? Understand What You Are Really Losing

Breakups are painful. It really doesn’t matter if you’re losing someone you’ve known for six months or six years. When you love someone and want a relationship to work, accepting the loss is painstaking. While I would never discount the reality of how important another human being is to another, losing a relationship is complex. In reality, you are losing much more than the person you’ve come to know as your significant other. That is why loss can take many turns and go down varying depths. Here are some examples of what you may be losing in addition to the person and relationship you valued.

You may be losing

  • The fantasy of what you thought this relationship would be.
  • The hope that you would never feel lonely or unlovable again.
  • The sense of security, financial or otherwise.
  • Physical touch, sexual intimacy and affection.
  • The family you’ve created as you know it to be.
  • The feeling of being “okay” in the eyes of society.
  • A sense of power or control.
  • The belief that life is fair and just.
  • The belief that love conquers all (and any other beliefs you had on life and love).
  • A way to avoid being self-reliant or fully empowered (or any other things about yourself or life that scare you).
  • A way of life and all the perks that go with being in a committed intimate relationship. This may include cooking, cleaning, nursing, home repairs, travel companionship, and overall support in handling everyday life.
  • Someone with whom you’ve shared your heart, your soul and your life—a friend and lover—someone you will miss—even though you know the relationship was not meant to be.

If you are going through a loss, give yourself time to grieve all the loses this breakup entails. Get the support you deserve. And remember, this too will pass.

If you or someone you or someone you know is going through a breakup, don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.

Be well,

Julie

About me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About your relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

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Saturday
Apr112015

Change is in the Air! What you need to do to make it work.

What changes have been happening in your life? Are you starting a new job or business venture? Have you moved? Starting to date someone new? Starting over all together?  Life changes are both exciting and challenging at the same time. They require letting go of the old, defining the new, and dealing with the unknown as you say goodbye to the past and get comfortable with your new future.

Changes and times of transition offer us tremendous opportunities to expand and grow. We discover things that empower us and things that humble us.

If you are dealing with a challenging change, get the support you deserve. Big changes require a team approach. Decide who you want on your change team and how they will support you in successfully navigating the transition. Some examples of team members include friends, mentors, advisors, coaches, counselors, family members and specific people who have specific skill-sets and professional know-how. Whoever you decide to include on your team, make sure you build your team. Don't go at alone. If you don't, you will be more stressed and less likely to succeed.

Having the right people in the right place at the right time ensures your success and well-being.

Life is full of change and my life is no exception. It seems like just when I've settled in from one change, I'm off to the next. My latest news?

I'm pleased to announce that I've moved to a new and beautiful office in Hermosa Beach. But before you start wondering where it is, you won't have to look far. Our new office is just across the hall from the old office--we're now at 2615 Pacific Coast Highway, Suite 327 Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

The good news is that the new offices enable me to accommodate more psychotherapy and coaching clients. So if you've been putting off taking the time to take care of yourself, your relationship and your life--this is the time to take action. Give me a call at 310-379-5855310-379-5855  and start creating the life you choose. I work with individuals, couples and and families. And whether you are feeling anxious, depressed, frustrated or resigned, there really is a way to shift the way you live your life and relate to others that results in more fulfillment and satisfaction.

Not in the Los Angeles area? No problem. I work via phone or Skype for those that are not able to come to the office. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised how effective a virtual session can be. I've been doing this work for over 25 years and some of the most powerful and impactful sessions I've had with clients have been conducted by phone.

As always, I'm here to support you in creating strong and intimate relationships in every area of your life!

Be well,

Julie 

About Me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About Your Relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz,

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Sunday
Sep142014

A Encore of Julie Orlov Q&A on Love and Relationships: Why was my ex able to move on so quickly?

Watch this weeks “Ask an Expert” video as Julie Orlov answers your questions on love and relationships. Today's question is "Why was my ex able to move on so quickly?" Did our 15 year marriage mean anything?"

Going through a divorce is hard. When an ex-spouse remarries, it is common for the other party to have some feelings—even if they were the one that wanted the divorce in the first place. A lot of feelings come up, including jealousy, resentment, hurt, and a final layer of loss. If an ex gets remarried immediately after the divorce papers are signed, it can elicit other questions as well.

Today’s question addresses these issues. Watch and learn the different ways people mourn and let go during the process of divorce and what it does and does not mean if your ex remarries quickly.

Click Read in Browser to watch the video on my blog or click the link below to watch this and other videos on my YouTube channel.

Be well,

Julie

P.S. If you or someone you know wants to let go of the past and find a new love, don't hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized guidance and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today. Take advantage of the opportunity receive the support and guidance you deserve. 

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com

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Wednesday
Mar262014

Coping with Endings: Three Must Do's in Times of Transition

Endings are hard. Even if you know that it is best for you to let go of a relationship, going through the process is painful. Here are three very important things to do in order to move through your loss with more power and ease.

  1. Settle into the sadness and loss. Don't try to minimize, deny, self-medicate or distract yourself from all the normal and natural feelings that arise when going through a loss. Sometimes people will run from the feelings simply because they're afraid that if the submit to them, they will drown in them. Please know that you will come out the other end. You will feel better in time. But you can't get to the other side without going through the hard part first. So feel your feelings and be patient and kind with yourself.
  2. Understand that during times of transitions you will feel lost, anxious and unsteady. This occurs in the in-between time from accepting the loss to finding a new normal. This entails feeling uncomfortable for a while. When you're in that in-between space, you need to understand that this is a necessary time to figure out who you are as a person without your ex, what you need to learn from having had that relationship and what you want to create in your next relationship. It takes time to feel comfortable in your own skin as a single person. The emptiness is pronounced. The more you can settle into this transitional time, the easier it will be for you to recognize lessons learned from the past and new opportunities that await you in your future. Don't rush this process. You will move through this in your own time and way. Be patient and get comfortable with the unknown. Remember, one needs to be confused before clarity occurs.
  3. Embrace your new life as it unfolds. Don't be afraid to let love in again. Enjoy feeling strong and content as a single person. In other words, when the dust settles and you feel whole again, say yes--yes to new people, experiences, and opportunities. Live your life to the fullest! 

If you or someone you know is struggling with a loss, please don't hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today. Take advantage of the opportunity receive the support and guidance you deserve. 

Be well,

Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com

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Wednesday
Sep112013

Desperate to Win Back Your Ex? What Are You Really Desperate For?

I get tons of emails from people asking me how to win their boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband, you name it, back. They are in pain and desperate. They regret breaking up with their significant other or worse, regret causing the breakup in the first place—or so it seems.

As people struggle with the transition from being a ‘we’ to an ‘I’, it is normal to want a do-over—to go back and make things right. I find this to be true regardless if you were the one who made the decision to break up or not. What's even more interesting, is that this phenomenon occurs even when the relationship and/or the "ex" was less than desirable—people will ignore all the reasons the relationship ended in the first place. During this painful time of detaching and feeling like there is no solid ground beneath you, one's memory of the relationship becomes distorted. All of a sudden, all the horrible things your ex did or the fact that you wanted a serious relationship and your ex did not, goes to the way side.  All you can think about is how to get him or her back. The ‘getting back’ becomes paramount regardless of the circumstances. You can't seem to stop and consider if you got what you wanted, would you want what you got?

Having said this, there are those situations when someone sabotaged a relationship or ran from one out of fear who later discovered that their fears were not nearly as important or relevant as being with the person they grew to love. Under these circumstances, it makes sense to revisit the relationship with a new appreciation and understanding of what really matters to you and what you're willing to do to win your love back and make it work. However, these individuals typically do not exhibit any desperate energy. They choose to contact their ex and have an open and honest conversation about what their past behaviors were all about and what they'd like to create from here on out. Sometimes it's too late and sometimes it's not. They accept whatever verdict ensues.

But for those of you that feel desperate, as if your life cannot go on without your ex, here are some things for you to consider before you go about trying to cajole and manipulate anyone back. Ask yourself the following:

To read full article, click Read in Browser.

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