What are people saying about The Pathway to Love:

“Insightful, practical, heartfully and psychologically sound, The Pathway to Love provides the steppingstones to creating genuine love in your life.  It is a must-read for those who value honesty, authentic commitment to self and other, and appreciate relationship as a vehicle to self-actualization.”

—Michael Bernard Beckwith, author of Spiritual Liberation~Fulfilling Your Soul’s Potential


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You will wonder at times how she knew about you and a particular significant other because she seems to describe you and the relationship to a T. And, when you read the last page you will wish you had read it years and a number of relationships earlier.

Irene Conlan

I have read other books on this topic which spoke to me... This book, which I got in the Kindle version, pulled it all together for me--the biology, personal values, self identity, the human quest for belonging and intimacy. The book... brought to me great understanding. I wish I had ordered the paper version with the workbook. I ended up going back and ordering it.

Paula Markgraf Katz

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Entries in acceptance (3)


Find Out The Secret to Change and Transformation

"We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses." C.G. Jung

This quote reflects and reaffirms the heart of phase three in The Pathway to Love. Acceptance is an absolute pre-requisite for intimacy, healing and transformation.

Acceptance is what creates a sacred space. A sacred space is what creates a possibility for something new, different, deeper, more meaningful. It is through our acceptance that we find our way in, out, and through.

So next time you find yourself in a power struggle or at war with yourself or someone else, stop and ask yourself "What do I need to accept?"

Next time you find yourself impatient, frustrated, or wishing things were different, stop and ask yourself "How can I accept things as they are in this very moment?"

And finally, next time you find yourself berating yourself, stop and ask yourself "How can I demonstrate compassion, understanding and acceptance for myself?"

The answers lie within the space of acceptance. Once we accept ourselves, others, and circumstances for who and what they are, we unlock the key to knowing exactly what to choose and do next and who we want to become.

For more information on the four phases of a developing relationship, please visit www.JulieOrlov.com/pathway-to-love. If you are interested in scheduling a coaching or psychotherapy appointment, please call 310-379-5855 or 1-888-99PATHS.

As always, I am committed to helping you create strong and intimate relationships.

Be well,

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The Illusion of Control

Have you ever woken up feeling the blues? You know, that feeling of being unsettled, as if you, your life, or your relationships just aren’t matching up to your expectations. You feel like something is askew but you don’t know how to fix things and make them right. You wish you could figure out how to make things right but you keep ruminating on what is wrong and are at a loss on what to do about it. Well, you are not alone. Everyone suffers from this from time to time. For some reason we are most prone to this condition on Monday mornings. And while most people will identify this as the Monday morning blues, I believe that what we are really suffering from is our illusion of control.

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Lessons from Japan: Number Two. Don’t get attached to any “one” tomorrow.

There is so much change happening in any one single moment. Our minds simply can’t compute and grasp how many conditions must be met prior to each moment in order for that moment to occur. It simply boggles the mind. If we spent our time paying attention to each and every moment and what went into that moment’s birth, we wouldn’t get too much done. I am personally grateful that our minds are set up to operate quite the opposite. Our minds are designed to perceive, filter, interpret, summarize and store information that it deems important. All the rest gets pushed aside. This not only allows us to go about our daily lives in relative peace, but also enables us to go through each day with “ignorant bliss.” We get to maintain some kind of illusion that our lives are under “control” and that we can pretty much feel safe and secure in knowing what tomorrow will bring—usually more of the same. However, in reality life can't help but remind us again and again that this is really not how it works.

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