What are people saying about The Pathway to Love:

“Insightful, practical, heartfully and psychologically sound, The Pathway to Love provides the steppingstones to creating genuine love in your life.  It is a must-read for those who value honesty, authentic commitment to self and other, and appreciate relationship as a vehicle to self-actualization.”

—Michael Bernard Beckwith, author of Spiritual Liberation~Fulfilling Your Soul’s Potential

 

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You will wonder at times how she knew about you and a particular significant other because she seems to describe you and the relationship to a T. And, when you read the last page you will wish you had read it years and a number of relationships earlier.

Irene Conlan

I have read other books on this topic which spoke to me... This book, which I got in the Kindle version, pulled it all together for me--the biology, personal values, self identity, the human quest for belonging and intimacy. The book... brought to me great understanding. I wish I had ordered the paper version with the workbook. I ended up going back and ordering it.

Paula Markgraf Katz

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Entries in stress (2)

Sunday
May222016

When is Enough Really Enough? 

This article isn’t about what you might think it is. It’s not about when to call it quits. It’s about creating a win-win for you and others. It’s about being satisfied with what is, rather than always looking for something bigger, better or perfect.

We live in a society that thrives on striving for more—more money, bigger houses, fancier cars, perfect bodies, ideal partners. We are bombarded with messages on how what we have and who we are is not enough. Our economy depends on this. If we don’t want more, spend more, generate more, demand more, then we (and our economy) will wither away. But is this really true?

If we look to our eco-system, the opposite is true. In nature, equilibrium is the ideal state. When the brush gets too big, a brush fire brings the environment back in balance. If a herd of caribou becomes too large, predators, illness or a rough winter kills off some of the herd and returns the herd to a size that is sustainable. Nature does not run on the paradigm that bigger is better. It runs on the rule of homeostasis. It understands that there is a sweet spot when enough is enough. And when this becomes out of balance, nature will always find a way to slow down or stop growth until a healthy state of equilibrium returns.

So let’s take a look at our own lives. Is your life in balance? Are you striving for more in one area of your life at the cost of another? Are you working too many hours in order to get “more”, only to lose in the quality of your interpersonal relationships? Do you expect your partner to get it right all the time at the expense of your overall happiness? Can you be satisfied with what you have rather than putting off feeling at peace until something bigger or better comes along?

The secret to life is being a peace with what is—understanding that when your equilibrium is out of whack, you are able and willing to course correct in order to regain a state of balance. It is crucial that we return to our basic nature of nature. While growth is important and inevitable, the laws of nature require that homeostasis and equilibrium circumvent uncontrolled growth. In other words, we need to be able to say “enough is enough” and mean it. We need to commit to sharing resources in a way where everyone’s needs get met. We need to take a stand against growth just for the sake of growth, especially when that growth does not meet the needs of the greater whole.

So the next time you feel you need for a bigger house, a bigger paycheck, or a bigger set of life affirming objects, stop and think again. Is your life in balance? Are others’ lives in balance? When is enough really enough? The best gift you can give yourself and others is the gift of being able to “win” with what is.

Be well,

Julie

P.S. If you or someone you or someone you know would like to create more win-win’s, don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.

About me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About your relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Click to read more ...

Saturday
Jan302016

What’s the Rush? Slow Down...

I went to my doctor’s office the other week for my annual physical. He asked how I was doing and I said I was feeling tired, as if my fatigue had a hold of me and wasn’t letting go. He replied by saying that fatigue is the number one complaint he hears from every single person he sees week in and week out. We began to talk about why this is so—why is our culture so driven to do more, faster. Employers demand more output with less resources from their employees every year. Kids have more homework and extra-curriculum activities than any other time in recent history. Americans demand instant gratification in every area of our lives—and the internet and social media have helped deliver on that promise. We not only want services and products delivered in supersonic speed, we have come to expect that information and responses from emails, texts and postings come instantaneously.

Even in the area of relationships, people expect each other to meet our physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual and sexual needs when we have them and in the way we want them met.

No wonder we’re tired.

To manage all this fatigue, we’ve become addicted to adrenaline, energy drinks, caffeine, sugar, illegal and prescription drugs. We need these to keep up a pace that isn’t conducive to our human condition. Basically, we’re a sleep deprived, stressed-out mess.

It doesn’t take long to see the consequences of our never-ending pursuit of “doing more, faster.”

Our physical health, personal relationships and quality of life continues to suffer.

What will it take for us to get the message?

I don’t know. But what I do know is that we all, myself included, need to SLOW Down!

This week I challenge you to slow down. Say no to the assignment that will push you over the edge. Turn off your cell phone and computer. Spend time with your friends and family outside in nature. Sleep in this weekend and take an afternoon nap. Set healthy limits and boundaries. Your life depends on it!

Let’s all slow down….

I’d love to hear what you did (or better said, what you didn’t do) this week to slow down. Feel free to leave your comments by clicking here.  But remember, no rush :-).

Be well,

Julie

P.S. If you or someone you love wants to create a better life, please don't hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.

About me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About your relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Click to read more ...