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I have read other books on this topic which spoke to me... This book, which I got in the Kindle version, pulled it all together for me--the biology, personal values, self identity, the human quest for belonging and intimacy. The book... brought to me great understanding. I wish I had ordered the paper version with the workbook. I ended up going back and ordering it.

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Sunday
Nov022014

How Is Your Relationship Like Your Checking Account?

As it was the first of the month, I spent part of the day taking care of my bills. As I entered all my deposits and withdrawals from my checking account into my online registry, I realized what a wonderful analogy this is for our relationships. So what does a checking account have to do with your relationships? 

If you only take withdrawals and never make any deposits, your account balance will eventually go to zero. If you continue to spend irresponsibly, your account will eventually be closed and the bank will charge you for insufficient funds. It’s a lose-lose operation.

The same goes for relationships. If you only take without giving, your relationship will become non-sustainable as well. A healthy relationship requires regular on-going deposits—deposits of love, good will, nurturing, support, favors, and just taking care of business. Without these, the deficit will lead to dissatisfaction and resignation. The relationship will not survive.

If you put some money into your checking account and never do anything with it, you may not suffer any immediate loss but you will not earn any return on your initial investment either. In today’s economy, money must be put to work so that it can work for you. It’s a two-way street.

The same goes for relationships. If you put a lot of effort in during its’ formation but then assume that’s all you need to do, the relationship will not bring much return on your investment. When you understand what it takes to make the relationship work over time, the relationship will bring you better levels of return on that initial investment.

So ask yourself these questions.

  1. Am I making consistent, regular, on-going deposits into my relationship?
  2. Did I make more efforts early on, only to ignore my relationship more as time went on?
  3. What’s the balance in my relationship? Am I taking more than I am giving?
  4. Am I putting in the effort needed for my relationship to work better on my behalf and my partner’s behalf?

I suggest you ask yourself these questions every month. Maybe make it a ritual that goes along with paying your monthly bills. Because understanding your relationship’s balance is just as important as knowing how much money you have in your checking account.

If you or someone you know wants to create strong and intimate relationships in every area of your life, don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized guidance and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today. Take advantage of the opportunity receive the support and guidance you deserve. 

As always, I’m here to support you in creating strong and intimate relationships.

Be well,

Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

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